Luck O' the Irish

10 Aspects of a Successful

St. Patrick's Day Evening

1. I was felt up by an actual Irishman.

2. I did not consume any green liquids, cause that is just dumb.

3. I hugged a pint of Guinness as big as myself!

4. I shouted out lyrics to the only Irish songs I know along with everyone else in the joint.

5. I was not exposed to vomit in any way, my own or anyone else's. Ew.

6. I received bar schwag with that says Guinness and Harp on it. (Birthday presents for Daddy!)

7. While I actually paid for one beer I drank, I drank at least six others that were purchased on my behalf. (Way to be Herbie, Coco the Monkey, Jeremy, and whoeverelse! Nice guys.)

8. The debate I engaged in with the Officer was brief and did not result in 'action' on either of our parts. We kept the peace with each other. I am proud of us Officer Morrison, you killjoy you.

9. I was able to walk home from the party in only five minutes on the arms of friends.

And my new St. Patrick's Day tradition......

10. I woke up in a t-shirt that said Jameson Whiskey on it and I am not quite sure where that came from.