The Love & The Hate

Stories like this one make me believe in love. This woman is only three feet tall and she weighed less than forty pounds! A large dog weighs more than that. To top it off she is in a wheelchair and suffers from a brittle bone disease. And yet she has found a life partner (a nice looking one too in my opinion) and has procreated. In addition to his cuteness and fertility I am sure her husband does the bulk of the housework, seeing as she is not tall enough to reach the top of the washing machine. This is great! This is what love stories should look like. I am tired of stories with gorgeous ladies like Nicole Kidman. How hard is it to fall in love with her? I am not watching any more romantic comedies until one half of the movie couple is at least average looking.

But it isn't a boycott...not yet. I only have three established media boycotts. Most people who know me know of the first to, the third is more recent. But I will gladly list my boycott roster here for those who care to know.

1. Woody Allen - Because he has a daughterwife and that is disgusting. This boycott was started back when the world learned of his depravity, so it has been a while. My distaste was reaffirmed by a certain Mr. Nastypants in his 70th birthday interview with Vanity Fair. Not only did he say his marriage to his daughterwife "has a more paternal feel," which is creepy enough, but he said he has no regrets. Fine, don't regret falling in love...but have the decency to regret cheating on your long term partner with her own daughter who had seen you as a father figure for the past decade. EW.

2. Steven Seagal - Not only is he the lamest action hero in the universe, he is also a complete hypocrite. He claims to be a devout Buddhist and even donated a wad of money to his local chapter of Tibetans. For this he requested an honorary lama-ship, which was promptly denied by His Holiness. His Holiness reasoned that an exalted position such as that was not an option for one who made a career glorifying violence and has the stupidest male-ponytail ever. Well, I added that bit about the ponytail, but I feel confident that His Holiness shares my view on that issue.

3. Tom Cruise - He is obviously mentally ill and is diggin his own grave by bad mouthing those in the only profession that is trained to help him. I am offended by his casting dispersions on my field. I would be happy to debate the overdiagnosis of ADHD and the overmedication of our population. But I'll be damned if some scientology believein', couch jumpin', five foot tall freak is gonna call what I do a sham. He can tell it to the aliens that he believes populated the Earth.

So my boycotts don't really effect anyone but me. And maybe the friends I refuse to accompany to movies featuring any of the above. And it isn't hard to keep up the boycott seeing as SS has never made a quality film and TC jumped the shark one Mission Impossible ago, overrated pretty boy that he is.

And to wrap this all up I must give a shout out to T-Bone, who is turning the big 3-6 today! My lovely friend, you were the best sugar daddy a girl could've ever wanted and may you have happiness on this the day of your birth.